What Does it Mean to Change?
Thoughts about change usually only occur when life no longer offers you the feeling of being satisfied. They can also emerge when things are basically alright but there is room for improvement. The difficulty frequently lies in finding out specifically what you can improve, what you should move on from, what you should let go of.
Change is not easy or simple. It can only really take place if you are ready to take action. Research shows 90% of the strategies designed for change assume people are ready to take action. In reality only 20% of the people already involved in some process of change are actually ready to take action. This helps explain why so many attempts to keep New Year’s resolutions, lose weight, change behaviour patterns, etc. are doomed to fail. If you have been told you should change, but are not really convinced this is true, you are more likely to fail at completing the process.
It is most helpful and supportive and will increase your chances of successfully completing change if you
Constant Interruptions, Disturbances, Noise - How They Can Rob You of Your Focus (and Motivation)
They are building all around me. This week even with a jackhammer below me. It is unbearably noisy. This noise totally robs me of my focus and consequently motivation.
So, I am now sitting in a quiet restaurant right by the lake writing this. :) Hotel lobbies seem to be my place for creative thoughts.
Nothing against the builders or the need to repair / renovate something in the building. That is life and we need to do maintenance on buildings, as much as we need maintenance in the form of self-care.
My struggle this morning is the level of noise. It makes me realize how much noise makes focussing difficult for me.
I intended to attempt my morning brain training before I started work but found the sound of the drills and jackhammer below me disrupting. In fact so disrupting that I left the house and retreated to this lakeside location.
No matter how much I encouraged myself I could handle it - the truth is I could not.
How to be a Good Friend to Yourself
The first and most important step is to realize and truly acknowledge that unless you take care of yourself nobody else can or will. When I say, “truly acknowledge”, I mean that you have accepted the following:
These are a few examples, expressed in simple terms: You have taken charge of your life, know your Values and maintain your Personal Power. You can live your life … it does not have to be living you!
As an independent adult you have become the “director” of your life. If you are feeling stressed, one of the simplest yet most effective ways to reduce the tension is to spend some time doing something that involves your senses. Look out of the window, take a walk, listen to music, sing, do something creative, draw, bake, cook, garden, pot a plant, take a bath and light some candles, buy some flowers, look at nature, or revisit a long forgotten hobby – to name just a few options. Taking a few breaths does not take a long time, but does 'break the energy of the stressful / challenging moment. Once the energy is broken you can think more clearly to deal with the issue.
Whenever possible take a break from technology, even if only for one hour. If that is not possible, try 10 minutes during which you turn off your computer, your phone, TV, etc. If you cannot go outside, then look out of the window at the sky. Regardless of the weather, the sky can be inspiring and energizing.
Here are some helpful suggestions to ask yourself:
by Suzie Doscher, Professional Executive Coach focusing on Self-Development, Self-help Author since 2014.
3 Editions (2014, 2018, 2022) of BALANCE - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments.
Photo credit: Pexels
Contact Suzie for a chat on how she can help support you.
“Challenges in life either do or do not have solutions.
If there is a solution somewhere,
then there is no need to be overwhelmed by the challenge.
If there genuinely is no solution,
then there is no point being overwhelmed by it”.
If you genuinely believe there is a solution to every problem there is a greater likelihood that you will find the solution. Personally, I believe the approach “where there is a will, there is a way.” I do not always find the way as soon as I had hoped for – which can sometimes be due to a lack of motivation. I then remind myself that I know nothing stays the same and therefore have nothing to fear.
Things will change even if I do nothing.
Obviously, I might not get the outcome I had hoped for but then again if I chose not to get myself motivated then that was my choice!
When I find myself lacking motivation I either find someone to talk to or brainstorm with me, or I take any time pressure off myself and see what comes up on its own.
Sometimes it is not the right time to deal with an issue, solve a work related problem, make a change or whatever the challenge is you might be facing. This does not mean you have given up on finding the solution. To me this means I am not in the right frame of mind, nor am I in a strong emotional place or have enough time, to focus on resolving whatever requires attention.
Really believing that you can find a solution to a problem gives you an advantage. This advantage is strength and personal power. You are more likely to overcome nearly all, if not all, the problems you are faced with. Sometimes the best solution is to walk away from something.
If an issue overwhelms me I break it down into smaller issues I can cope with.
I remember having to read through a rather large contract one day. The only way I could cope with it was to give myself permission to only have to read five pages in the morning and five pages in the afternoon. So, my solution was to break the reading down into smaller steps.
If you are fully convinced that a solution exists for every problem, then problems no longer feel like problems, instead they become tasks to deal with. I suggest they be regarded as projects that now need project management.
Your thinking makes a world of difference to what you achieve.
(an excerpt from the 1st edition of Balance - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments.
by Suzie Doscher, Professional Executive Coach since 2006, Self-help Author since 2014.
Raise your self-awareness with this: