Executive Coach Focusing on Personal Development, Zurich, Switzerland
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You're Less Productive in the Afternoon - Especially on Fridays

15/9/2023

 
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Most of us will know that feeling - our attention can drop off during the day and our efficient mornings can then blend into less efficient afternoons. And Friday afternoon? Well, you can write that off!

This feeling, or assumption, is now backed up by some science, and pretty solid science at that in a novel piece of research.

The research was conducted by a team around Drs. Taehyun Roh and Nishat Tasnim Hasan of the Texas A&M University. Much previous work has used self report studies or wearable technology for short periods of time - these can be invasive and in the case of self reporting very subjective.

In this study the researchers tracked a large group of workers (789) at an energy company in Texas over two full years making this an impressive real world dataset. What they found is that computer use and output increased to Wednesday and then dropped off until Friday.

What’s more, usage dropped off in the afternoon and also typos increased - a sign of fatigue and wavering attention. This was particularly bad on Friday afternoons - probably no surprise there - fatigue setting in not to mention the psychological impact of the looming weekend.

The authors argue that this also supports shorter working weeks and other forms of work such as hybrid work or working from home as this can counter fatigue and increase productivity.

After looking at the data it seem like it would make sense to just cancel Friday! Alas but then Thursday may become the new Friday. But seriously, evidence is strong for the effectiveness of the 4-day work week. One solid study published early in the year for Cambridge University showed increased wellbeing while preserving productivity.
Sounds good to me!

by ANDY HAYMAKER
Photo credit: Pexels


Reference:
Taehyun Roh, Chukwuemeka Esomonu, Joseph Hendricks, Anisha Aggarwal, Nishat Tasnim Hasan, Mark Benden. 
Examining workweek variations in computer usage patterns: An application of ergonomic monitoring software. 
PLOS ONE, 2023; 18 (7): e0287976 
DOI: 10.1371/journal.pone.0287976

Light Activity Improves Brain Function

7/9/2023

 
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More research showing that a little can do a lot
In the quest for fitness and health there has been a focus on exercise as a key factor - we all know that. And recommendations are normally about increasing heart rates over long periods of time or possible also shorter more intensive sessions. These have also been shown to improve cognitive function - making your brain more effective.

However, the route to greater health may be easier - or more specifically of enhanced brain function. The effects of light activity in the focus on more intensive and extensive exercise has been largely underestimated - and is considered by some to be a key factor in public health. Our engagement in light activity has over the decades decreased significantly - see my previous article here.
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In this research just out Ryuta Kuwamizu and colleagues of the University of Tsukuba in Japan conducted a simple but effective experiment. In this participants did 10 mins of easy exercise - in this case light pedalling while seated. During this they measured pupil dilation because this is also related to brain function specifically executive function. Executive function refers to harder cognitive tasks such as decision making, short-term, memory, calculation, and analysis - basically what many consider the heavy lifting of the brain in our daily lives.

Yes, and indeed just this short light exercise intervention increased delation of the pupil and this was directly related to improved executive functions which was determined though scanning the frontal part of the brain where our executive functions reside with a technique called near infrared spectroscopy.
This therefore points to, as I have mentioned in other places, the significant benefits of short bouts of light exercise on improved brain function - something of particular interest to businesses no doubt. I have long since promoted the idea of regular short walking breaks - this shows again why. For a review of the benefits of walking see this article here).

Not that it has to be at work - a walk or light exercise will improve your brain function - and that is good for all of us, all the time.

by ANDY HAYMAKER
Photo credit: Pexels

​
Reference:
Ryuta Kuwamizu, Yudai Yamazaki, Naoki Aoike, Taichi Hiraga, Toshiaki Hata, Michael A. Yassa, Hideaki Soya.
Pupil dynamics during very light exercise predict benefits to prefrontal cognition
NeuroImage, Volume 277, 2023.
https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neuroimage.2023.120244 



The Downside of Focusing Only on Reaching Targets

31/8/2023

 
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There’s more to life than reaching targets – Try including life skills for support to achieve a more balanced life?
When a company focuses solely on reaching targets and continually pushes employees to reach these goals, the side effects often result in a high turnover and burnout rate.
​Ironically, this can cause the company NOT to achieve its targets in the desired timeframe. Pushing too hard in one direction results in an inevitable push back from the opposite direction. This is a law of nature that applies to the business world as well. 

 
Stressed employees trying to reach sometimes unrealistic or unnecessary targets tend to operate at half of their capacity. They start to make mistakes and lose track of the details amid their overwhelming work schedules. They tend to suffer physically exhaustion as well. All of this hurts productivity, the very thing the company is trying to increase. 

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​8 Ways to Boost Your Self-Esteem

31/8/2023

 
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A lack of self-confidence can negatively affect one or all areas of you life. Life Coach Rebekah Fensome provides 8 surefire ways to boost your self-esteem.

I am so proud of my client Sophie.

She came to me six months ago with self-confidence issues. She felt intimated by certain people at work as she believed they were better than her and when she was placed in social situation where she had to talk to new people she felt they did not really want to be stuck talking to her.

I truly believe that no one want to talk to me, she told me. I am boring and do not know what to say most of the time. My mind goes blank when I meet new people and I get really embarrassed trying to make small talk at work. As for dating – I have not done that for 2 years!


After a couple of sessions with Sophie, it became clear that she had lost sight of who she was, what her values were and what made her unique and special. She had also got into the unhelpful habit of putting herself down in front of people and been in her current job for two years without a promotion. She also strongly believed that men did not find her attractive and regarded her as a friend and nothing else.
 
Eight tips to better self-esteem
 
Here are some of the discoveries we made and techniques we developed together:

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Helpful Suggestions When Communicating With Control Freaks

22/8/2023

 
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In the Oxford Dictionary, the definition of a “control freak” is “a person who feels an obsessive need to exercise control over themselves and others and to take command of any situation.” The Merriam Webster dictionary says that a control freak is “a person whose behaviour indicates a powerful need to control people or circumstances in everyday matters.”

This personality trait could stem from a chaotic childhood, alcoholic parents, abusive behaviour, or early abandonment. Such experiences can make it hard for people to trust or relinquish control to others. The fear of falling apart pushes them to control what they can. As their emotions are all over the place, they feel loss of control. For this reason control freaks will micromanage whatever they can with the belief that this makes them strong. People who feel out of control tend to become controllers.

I imagine each and every one of us is a control freak, or takes on the behaviour of such, at some point or another. The fear of failure is what makes it so important to control everything when you do not trust anybody else to do a good job.

One difficult aspect of being around a control freak is accepting that they do not understand how their behaviour and choice of words affect the people around them. Another difficult aspect is not to take it personally. This behaviour comes from deep inside and the person is actually quite unaware of being a control freak.

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Each One of Us is Enough

4/8/2023

 
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You are good enough
Which of us doesn’t want to have a good life? Who doesn’t want to be enough? With a lovely house and garden, sweet children, a loving spouse, who come together for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. A life filled with good friends who celebrate over an elaborate meal and extended family that come together often with smiles and hugs. A life with a rewarding job that appreciates your work and brings out your best.
While these scenarios might be things that people dream about, they are scenes from stock photos, advertising campaigns, lifestyle shows, and social media influencers. Yet they inspire us to want to be perfect, to have perfect lives. They prey on our feelings that we are not enough. Then, for many of us, the drive to have a perfect life overwhelms.

In her book, End the Struggle and Dance With Life, Susan called the drive to always be perfect an addiction. Always having to be the best, always going above and beyond, always having to prove yourself are just ways of trying to show the world, and yourself, that you are good enough. Being a perfectionist, while it might look as if everything is fantastic, takes its toll on our health and our relationships. It can also hold us back from new opportunities.

All those images and videos we see of perfect-looking people living perfect lives only has the echo of truth in them. What we never see in those images is the mess behind the camera. The other people working behind those scenes to make the illusion seem real. So while those images make us feel as if we are less than perfect, they only represent something superficially “perfect.”

The reason our addiction to perfection can be so devastating is that we believe our self-worth is measured by our performance. But since no one is perfect, it is impossible to attain self-worth through perfection.
​

Trying to be perfect in everything we do is only a means to feel as if we are good enough. 

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Self-help Audiobook: BALANCE - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments by Suzie Doscher

19/7/2023

 
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Listen to the INTRODUCTION to the self-help book:
BALANCE - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments by Suzie Doscher

Start listening now - Buy your copy on Audible or iTunes.

Asking “What If?” and Answering “I’ll Handle It”

8/6/2023

 
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Even the most enlightened of us can’t always stop ourselves from worrying about the future and asking ourselves “what if?” Underneath our connection to our Higher Self that we work so hard for, lurks the fear of future problems just waiting for an opening to ask us “what if?”

You know how it is…trouble is brewing at your job, layoffs could be coming. What if you lost your job? There have been a rash of pedestrian traffic accidents lately. What if your child is hit by a car? Your mother’s routine check-up turns into several follow-up appointments. What if she is sick? And on and on.
​
Before we know it, our Chatterboxes have taken over. We are filled with fears about the future and the “what if” questions drag us down to our Lower Self. Many of us “what if” ourselves into a perpetual state of worry.
“What if” questions come from our Lower Self, our inner chatterbox that wants us to live in perpetual fear. Susan wrote in Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, “When the ‘what ifs’ are out in full force, the internal Chatterbox is at it again. You look at the unknown and try to predict the future; you try to take control of outside forces. Both are impossible. At this point you might notice you are driving yourself crazy.”

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What Does it Mean to Change?

20/5/2023

 
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Thoughts about change usually only occur when life no longer offers you the feeling of being satisfied. They can also emerge when things are basically alright but there is room for improvement. The difficulty frequently lies in finding out specifically what you can improve, what you should move on from, what you should let go of.

Change is not easy or simple. It can only really take place if you are ready to take action. Research shows 90% of the strategies designed for change assume people are ready to take action. In reality only 20% of the people already involved in some process of change are actually ready to take action. This helps explain why so many attempts to keep New Year’s resolutions, lose weight, change behaviour patterns, etc. are doomed to fail. If you have been told you should change, but are not really convinced this is true, you are more likely to fail at completing the process.

It is most helpful and supportive and will increase your chances of successfully completing change if you 

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Constant Interruptions, Disturbances, Noise - How They Can Rob You of Your Focus (and Motivation)

23/4/2023

 
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They are building all around me. This week even with a jackhammer below me. It is unbearably noisy. This noise totally robs me of my focus and consequently motivation.

So, I am now sitting in a quiet restaurant right by the lake writing this. :) Hotel lobbies seem to be my place for creative thoughts. 

Nothing against the builders or the need to repair / renovate something in the building. That is life and we need to do maintenance on buildings, as much as we need maintenance in the form of self-care.

My struggle this morning is the level of noise. It makes me realize how much noise makes focussing difficult for me.
I intended to attempt my morning brain training before I started work but found the sound of the drills and jackhammer below me disrupting. In fact so disrupting that I left the house and retreated to this lakeside location.

No matter how much I encouraged myself I could handle it - the truth is I could not.

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Expand Your Horizons by Doing It Anyway

17/4/2023

 
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“We generate fears while we sit.
​We overcome them by action.”
 
​Dr. Henry Link

There is nothing like being comfy and cozy in our comfort zones. Right? The problem with that is, of course, that we can’t change or grow if we hold on to our comfort zones. As Susan wrote in Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, “Most of us operate within a zone that feels right, and outside of it we are uncomfortable. For each one of us that zone of comfort is different, but whether we are aware of it or not, all of us—rich or poor, famous or unknown, gay or straight, male or female or whatever our gender identity— make decisions based on the confines of that comfortable space.”

While we may feel secure in our comfort zone, we likely are living with the pain of neediness and the fear of change. While comfort zones can make us feel secure, they also keep us from feeling powerful. If we want to grow, to experience, to learn, we have to start moving out of complacency in that comfortable space. We have to start expanding our boundaries. To do so, we have to take action, we have to put in the work—even if it means being uncomfortable. That is the only way we can know our own power.

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How to be a Good Friend to Yourself

5/4/2023

 
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I believe self-care means self-respect and the ability to set boundaries.
The first and most important step is to realize and truly acknowledge that unless you take care of yourself nobody else can or will. When I say, “truly acknowledge”, I mean that you have accepted the following:
  • There is always another choice; to do, or not to do / to say, or not to say!
  • You are comfortable – saying “no” when necessary, knowing a “yes” does not serve you / is going to take something from you; time, energy, emotional stability.
  • You recognize when you have allowed yourself to slip into “victim mode”, have stayed there too long, and are ready to take your power back.
  • You know how to make, create, or find the time for yourself, and on the occasions when there simply is no time … you know to do a couple of minutes of deep breathing!
 
These are a few examples, expressed in simple terms: You have taken charge of your life, know your Values and maintain your Personal Power. You can live your life … it does not have to be living you!

As an independent adult you have become the “director” of your life. If you are feeling stressed, one of the simplest yet most effective ways to reduce the tension is to spend some time doing something that involves your senses. Look out of the window, take a walk, listen to music, sing, do something creative, draw, bake, cook, garden, pot a plant, take a bath and light some candles, buy some flowers, look at nature, or revisit a long forgotten hobby – to name just a few options. Taking a few breaths does not take a long time, but does 'break the energy of the stressful / challenging moment. Once the energy is broken you can think more clearly to deal with the issue. 

Whenever possible take a break from technology, even if only for one hour. If that is not possible, try 10 minutes during which you turn off your computer, your phone, TV, etc. If you cannot go outside, then look out of the window at the sky. Regardless of the weather, the sky can be inspiring and energizing.
 
Here are some helpful suggestions to ask yourself:
  1. Think about what exactly it is you are doing when you feel happy, fulfilled, at peace, nurtured.
  2. If you cannot come up with an answer … think back to a day or event that you enjoyed, that made you feel good.
  3. Use your imagination and senses to remember what that felt like.
  4. What can you draw from that feeling now? Might you be able to do it again? For example, were you outside, talking with a friend, eating something wonderful, sitting still, appreciating a view…? If it were not possible to do any of those things right now, what is possible right now that would be good for you?
  5. Can you take a walk, soak in the bath, listen to some music, talk to a friend, observe nature, do something creative or anything you do not normally do or have time for?
  6. Even 5 minutes will make a difference. You do not need to have all day to be kind to yourself.
  7. Do one thing a day … however small.

by Suzie Doscher, Professional Executive Coach focusing on Self-Development, Self-help Author since 2014.
3 Editions (2014, 2018, 2022) of BALANCE - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments.

​Photo credit: Pexels

​Contact Suzie for a chat on how she can help support you.

​Unwinding After Work - Leave Work at Work

22/3/2023

 
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How about going out for a sail, swim, drink, run, or meet friends, play with your children,
talk to your partner – without your head still being full of work-related information?
It can be difficult to leave work related thoughts behind at the end of the day. Too many people arrive
home and are not really present. Their body might have walked through the door but mentally they are miles away. This seems to be the reality in today's world. Remember: There is more to life than just work.
You do need some kind of balance between down-time and work to be the most effective. 
Clarity will come easier if you give your brain a rest. It is amazing what thoughts, ideas, solutions and insights can come to you by creating some space for them.
 
This is a common topic with my coaching clients. I might work with five different clients all on this particular topic, yet each one will find his or her own unique way to help themselves unwind and reenter their personal life.
 
First of all, it helps to remember and accept as an important truth that your work is only part of your life. It is wonderful if you love what you do and have passion for your work, but do not forget that your personal life is at least as important as your work.
 
The goal is not to neglect your work but also not neglect your family, friends, and self.
Establish and maintain a routine of self-care – start by unwinding from work on your way home.
Some examples that help my clients include: listening to music or an audiobook in the car or on the train, taking a walk and being more mindful while doing so, meeting a friend, or exercise.
Start instilling this habit and you will experience life as more satisfying, rewarding, happy, and healthier in mind and body.


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For a Fulfilling Life You Will Need Life Skills.

9/3/2023

 
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To reach your potential as well as feel content in the course of your life, having Life Skills is essential.
They are the “software” you have the option to acquire along the way.
You are born with the “hardware”; your body.
Your behaviour comes under the heading “software” because this can be changed, improved, modified, extended or even deleted if necessary.


Many of these Life Skills are received in the home and at school while growing up, others you learn later in your development, taught by “the school of life”, friends, colleagues, courses, books, teachers, trainers, and coaches. You can also teach yourself with patience and practice based on all of the above, plus past experiences, both positive and negative ones.

What makes one person successful while others keep struggling?
Everybody goes through difficult phases, has obstacles to overcome and disappointments to heal. This cannot be avoided. How you cope with all of these is the key to making your life a success.


Life Skills offer support with how you handle your life. They can be defined as a group of cognitive and personal abilities that enhance your capability to lead a life in which you reach your potential.
Every person has strengths and weaknesses; getting to know them is important in the process of finding out “who” you are and therefore “what” you want.
Not everybody has the same dream. You should not judge others but find your way forward based on your own values. The success of some people is not a matter of luck; they will have learned how to manage their life, and they will have acquired the life skills - the “software”.
​Understanding that life is about change, which is inevitable, is one of the first steps on this ladder to the top! Your personal worth will benefit knowing you have the necessary skills in life to face everything that comes your way with confidence.


by Suzie Doscher, Executive Coach focusing on Self-Development,
​Self-help Author since 2014.
Photocredit: Cottonbro / Pexels

Excerpt from the 1st Edition (2014)of BALANCE - a Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments.
3rd Updated version available in the Amazon Store of your country, or,
on iTunes / Audible as an Audiobook if you prefer listening.

Contact Suzie
​to explore how you can acquire some more life skills.

Watch Out That A Belief is Not Leading You to Self-Sabotage

23/2/2023

 
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I have witnessed all too often with friends, family, clients, and in my own life, how easy it is to go in circles or bang your head against the same wall when you try to get something done. It feels like you are blocked. You keep ending up in the same place, repeating the same patterns.

A coaching client of mine never quite achieved the goals he set for himself. Despite taking proactive steps, he still ended up going around in circles. On one level, he believed in the success of his project. Yet deep down inside, a little voice kept repeating, “What is the point? You will not succeed anyway." ...Click 'Read More' below

In his case, the little voice was his impatience, which kept him going around in the same circle. Instead of taking a little extra time to deal with issues that appeared, he would push forward, overlooking them until they had accumulated to a point where they blocked the success of the project. We reframed his limiting belief, “Things have to happen quickly in order to be successful,” to a healthier one: "Taking more time and care allows the project to come together more easily." The result was he had more patience, which lead to a successful outcome of his project.

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Challenges in Life Either Do or Do Not Have Solutions

29/1/2023

 
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“Challenges in life either do or do not have solutions.
If there is a solution somewhere,
then there is no need to be overwhelmed by the challenge.
If there genuinely is no solution,
then there is no point being overwhelmed by it”.
​
Unknown

If you genuinely believe there is a solution to every problem there is a greater likelihood that you will find the solution. Personally, I believe the approach “where there is a will, there is a way.” I do not always find the way as soon as I had hoped for – which can sometimes be due to a lack of motivation. I then remind myself that I know nothing stays the same and therefore have nothing to fear.
Things will change even if I do nothing.
Obviously, I might not get the outcome I had hoped for but then again if I chose not to get myself motivated then that was my choice!
When I find myself lacking motivation I either find someone to talk to or brainstorm with me, or I take any time pressure off myself and see what comes up on its own.


Sometimes it is not the right time to deal with an issue, solve a work related problem, make a change or whatever the challenge is you might be facing. This does not mean you have given up on finding the solution. To me this means I am not in the right frame of mind, nor am I in a strong emotional place or have enough time, to focus on resolving whatever requires attention.

Really believing that you can find a solution to a problem gives you an advantage. This advantage is strength and personal power. You are more likely to overcome nearly all, if not all, the problems you are faced with. Sometimes the best solution is to walk away from something.

If an issue overwhelms me I break it down into smaller issues I can cope with.
I remember having to read through a rather large contract one day. The only way I could cope with it was to give myself permission to only have to read five pages in the morning and five pages in the afternoon. So, my solution was to break the reading down into smaller steps.


If you are fully convinced that a solution exists for every problem, then problems no longer feel like problems, instead they become tasks to deal with. I suggest they be regarded as projects that now need project management.
Your thinking makes a world of difference to what you achieve.


(an excerpt from the 1st edition of Balance - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments.

​by Suzie Doscher, Professional Executive Coach since 2006, Self-help Author since 2014. 
​Photocredit: Pixaby/Pexels

Contact Suzie
​to schedule a chat to discuss your coaching needs.

Feeling Overwhelmed? Ask Yourself 'What is' and then 'What if'

11/1/2023

 
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Often plans, goals and wishes can be overwhelming. Overwhelming in that they might be fabulous thoughts and ideas however in reality you are not there yet and not even sure how to get there!

Feeling overwhelmed due to lack of time, outside pressures, demands, lack of clarity and a lack of energy can easily happen.

A good approach is to first consider what the reality is in the moment, now/today and only then explore the 'what ifs' - potential outcomes and consequences of the plan or goal.
​
Taking the time to connect with the present i.e. ‘what is’ will allow you to ground yourself. With this you can approach the feeling of overwhelm with both feet on the ground. 

Removing the emotions i.e. feeling of overwhelm, allows you to think more clearly. This has been proven by neuroscience: when emotions are present (have been triggered) the first thing to go are your cognitive abilities. This means you are emotional and not thinking clearly – you are emotional not rational.

To explore all the consequences of ‘what if’ is easier with a clear rational head.

Exploring all the possible ‘what ifs’ is necessary to break the goal, wish or desire down into small actionable steps.
If a change of your mindset/perspective is necessary, this shift could have occurred during the process of the 'what is' exploration.


One way or another you will gain some clarity by taking the time to do this.

At times this is easier said than done. The best approach can be to  simply start! 
Plan some time. 10 minutes will do. If you do not even start you will remain overwhelmed by it all. 
​Once you have taken one step, even a small one, you will feel it.
"One small step at a time will get you to the top of the ladder" ​

by Suzie Doscher, Executive Coach focusing on Personal Development, Self help Author since 2014
Photo credit: Unsplash

Listen to the audiobook version of:
​How to Break an Action Plan Down into Smaller Steps

How About Looking at 2023 As the year of Moving Forward?

12/12/2022

 
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First of all I wish you Happy Holidays and a productive start to the  new year.

I am a big believer that moving forward means improving the existing quality of your life. Of course reaching goals and increasing your performance it important.
How you feel while you are doing this is what I believe makes up for quality of life.
You can be reaching goals and increasing your performance by pushing through, being competitive while running on an empty battery. At some point your body and emotional self will not be able to keep up.

To increase your quality of life I suggest doing things differently or adding something entirely new to your routine.
Maybe this is changing your location or job, or even friends, these are big changes. How about starting with
 getting rid of some behaviour patterns that no longer serve you? Replace them with behaviour patterns that do serve you.

I love personal growth & development. My personal as well as professional experience can vouch for that each step taken, even small steps, result in change. Imagine climbing up a ladder. With each step your view changes and brings a new perspective.
 
 Make the kind of changes that stick!
 
Life changes all the time, sometimes daily. During your lifetime you never stop growing, developing and learning, which of course means changing. If you resist this, you run the risk of staying stuck.
 
Here is how you start:

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​Recognizing You Could be on Your Way to a Potential Burnout

1/12/2022

 
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If you recognize the warning signs of impending burnout in yourself; remember that it will only get worse if you leave it alone. But if you take steps to get your life back into balance, you can prevent burnout from becoming a full-blown breakdown.

Some tips:
  • Start the day with a relaxing ritual.
    Rather than jumping out of bed as soon as you wake up, spend a few minutes doing nothing – just lying there, or meditating, writing in your journal, doing gentle stretches, or reading something that inspires you. Whatever you chose to do that is realistic focus on it. If your children jump into bed with you and wake you up then try to focus on them. Children are grounded and in the moment. 
  • Adopt healthy eating, exercising, and sleeping habits. When you eat right, engage in regular physical activity, and get plenty of rest, you have the energy and resilience to deal with life's obstacles and demands. Start with one of them and attempt to follow through 2 -3 days per week. It is better to start than not at all or to set a goal that is bound not to be reached. You will feel so much better if you start slow and have a much better chance of following through. One step at a time gets you to the top of the ladder. 

Read More

Self-help Book to Help You "Grow Into Your Skin" and Be Yourself.

30/11/2022

 

A self-help book to further your personal development. BALANCE - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments by Suzie Doscher


Available in the Amazon Store of your country. In Paperback, on Kindle
​or as an Audiobook narrated by the author. (Audible or iTunes)

Feeling Calm and Grounded

16/11/2022

 
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In order to stay calm and grounded it requires certain behaviors that feed being calm and grounded.

Each person will have their own requirements to feel calm and grounded.
What actions you need to take will most likely differ from someone else’s. 
Just as each person has their own interpretation of success, the same goes for feeling calm and grounded. Listen to yourself to know what is best for you.

Based on my own personal experience this also changes depending on our age:
I know when I was 30, my focus was very different to 40.
  • At 30 I was focused on creating my family and being a wife and mother.
  • At 40 I was involved with my children’s education and day to day life, I was not thinking of my goals. I did not really have any beyond my children’s wellbeing and development.
  • At 50 I noticed that I had to get to know myself much better and feeling at peace and fulfilled became my goal. I found my purpose late but am thrilled it involves supporting others to grow.
  • Turning 60 was fabulous as I had completely grown into my skin by then and was more than happy to focus on my core values and needs and knew exactly what grounds me and offers me that wonderful sense of calm.
  • Approaching 70 my new goal is answering the question ‘how do I want this next chapter of my life to look and feel.
I have no complaints or regrets and admire the younger people I work with on their personal development while achieving and striving for their goals. I was never like that but love how my life was and is moving forward.  Each person will know what is right for them. Follow your heart and remember that 'you cannot take anything with you'. No matter what you achieve and how much you earn, how you feel is as important along the way. 


By Suzie Doscher, Executive Coach focusing on Personal Development, Self-help author since 2014. 

Photo credit: Pexels​

Emotionally Intelligent Stress Management

9/11/2022

 
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These are a sample of options you have when in need of some stress relief:
  • Take a break and leave the room. Find a quiet space, even the loo will do.  
  • Compose yourself by taking at least 3 breaths. As you exhale, imagine a little bit of the tension leaving your body. (I find visualizing a dark cloud dissipating helpful.)
  • Gather your thoughts.  
  • Keep your focus on exactly what has been going on that is causing you the stress. Is it the task itself? How about more basic such as hunger or the space around you?
  • Does it will involve another person or people… What is missing?  
  • Once you know specifically what has thrown you out of balance, think about what can you do now to influence the situation.
  • Consider all the steps required to find a solution. Make a list, if only a mental list.  
  • What can you do today, right now?  Arrange your list in terms of priority. What has to be done first, then what?  
  • Consider the practicalities of your action plan. Is it realistic? Have you the time?  
  • Do you need advice or support? If so, whose?  
  • Fine-tune the steps you consider necessary to resolve the situation. Keep things realistic to avoid feeling pressure.
  • Having thought things through you may find the problem has changed in perspective. Adjust the plan accordingly.

It is most import to ensure that any action you propose to take is in keeping with your personality and can be executed in a style that suits you.
 
by Suzie Doscher, Executive and Life Coach, Self-Help Author 

Balance - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments 
3rd editon out now in any Amazon store worldwide 

Audiobook narrated by Suzie Doscher on Audible and iTunes.

Photo by Shutterstock

Listen to excerpts from the Audiobook:
​Balance - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments by Suzie Doscher
​iTunes or Audible
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Creating Your Own Misery, Creating Your Own Joy

17/10/2022

 
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We all know the feeling—angry, upset, and sad because the world is making our life less than perfect. Our boss is mean, our friends aren’t there for us, other drivers cut us off in traffic, the store clerk was rude, we got a surprise bill from the electric company. On and on, we have so many miseries that are not our fault.
Susan wrote in Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, “We all have a tendency to look around for someone to blame if things are not working out to our liking.” Blaming others of things outside our control means we are not taking responsibility for ourselves. Blame makes us into an injured party who has no control, who lets the world beat them down, who doesn’t respect themselves, who lives in misery.

In Chapter 4, “Whether You Want It or Not…It’s Yours,” Susan talks a lot about taking responsibility for our own lives. As adults, we often feel that we are burdened with lots of responsibility. But responsibility for your day-to-day living is far different than taking responsibility for how you react to your day-to-day living.

Read More

​Thoughts keeping you awake at night?

2/9/2022

 
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Thoughts that are keeping you awake clearly want some attention. Otherwise, they would not still be lurking around in the back of your head, keeping your mind and body from unwinding and relaxing into a good night’s sleep. Sleep helps process our emotions. I look at a good night’s sleep as comparable to an effective filing system – while sleeping, your mind files what needs to be kept. Your emotions process and discard anything unnecessary.

The emotions have time to settle, and your intuition has a chance to speak to you. A good night’s sleep allows for a fresh mind, the possibility of a new approach, to start the day feeling more balanced.
Thinking habits and problem-solving skills, no matter how good and effective they are, do not always allow for the mind to be at peace every night.

There is only so much you can do with your mind to help relax. Not being able to sleep usually happens when your thoughts are running away with you. These thoughts, more often than not, are from the immediate past or about the future – relating to something that may or may not happen tomorrow.
The best way to shift your thoughts away from worries is to focus on something else and engage your body in the process.

One proven method is to pay close attention to your breathing. Try this:

Read More

15 Tips for Leaving Work at Work

19/8/2022

 
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In case you haven’t heard, work-life balance is a myth. At Thrive, we’re all about work-life integration. It’s different from work-life balance in that it’s a more holistic — and realistic — approach. The truth is that none of us will ever achieve perfect balance, and striving to get there just stresses us out. Work-life integration acknowledges that sometimes work will demand more of your attention, and other times life will, but by setting boundaries and making sure you’re prioritizing healthy habits, you’ll be able to thrive in all facets of your life. 
We asked our Thrive community for their best tips for leaving work at work, and they had some pretty great strategies.



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    Updated 3rd edition (2022)
    at Amazon stores worldwide
    AUDIO BOOK  narrated by Suzie Doscher on 
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     "A truly inspiring book" I have read this book at a point in my life where I wanted something to change and I didn't know if it ever could. Through these pages I have understood how our experience in life depends 90% on us and not on external events, and that is a life changing lesson indeed." Absolutely recommended.
    Suzie Doscher is a Professional Executive Coach focusing on Personal Development. Located in Zurich, Switzerland. Her approach to personal development is practical and successful.  
    Suzie is happiest when helping people. 
    Her vision is everyone should have access to techniques for personal growth and development. This was the motivation behind her book. 


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