1. The Present
Eckhart Tolle refers to living in the now, which means being able to see and feel what your life is in the present moment. The present-day buzzword for this is to be mindful by practicing mindfulness. Standing in a beautiful park, by a calming body of water, or attending your child’s school play or other family event, and actually seeing the trees, feeling the flow and energy of the water, enjoying the play or event while feeling joy instead of being lost in your thoughts (which are taking you elsewhere) is experiencing the now, the present moment, being mindful of that very moment. Thoughts can propel you into an entirely different location even if you are not there physically. It seems odd that we do not just naturally live in the now. After all, almost everyone would agree that the present moment, the now, is all we have. When you are able to live in the day life becomes more relaxed and enjoyable. You empower yourself by influencing what you can influence. This becomes a powerful technique to step out of stress. This is not to say you should never think of the future and plan to reach your goals and avoid pitfalls. It is more about how this is done. Keep your energy where it is needed - in the day. Examine your present-day reality and determine what is working and what is not working. Explore what you can influence and what not. by Suzie Doscher, Executive Coach and Life Coaching focusing on Personal Development, Self-Help Author: Balance - A Practical Handbook for Life's Difficult Moments
Coaching your team? Add this skill to your coaching style – being non-judgmental. There is an abundance of articles on being a coach to your people. I enjoy reading the quality information provided by the Harvard Business Review. The desire to increase, enhance or maintain the quality of work, and in some cases even the quality of life at work, is evident. The article in the HBR: Most Managers Don’t Know How to Coach. But They Can Learn, offers wonderful insights on what coaching is all about and aims to achieve. Your responsibilities include leading, motivating, inspiring and with your coaching you hope to further their growth, development and enhance their skills. by Suzie Doscher
Feel like you keep facing the same uphill struggle? Sometimes you create your own problems with your thoughts and beliefs. It is these particular thoughts that hold you back, keep you stuck and consequently limit you. In my coaching practice, as well as my own personal experience, I have witnessed how a self-sabotage routine can be created with these thoughts and beliefs. If you find that you keep coming back to the same type of situation again and again, it is well worth exploring if, in fact, you are running a self-sabotage routine. To break this self-sabotage cycle, you will need to first determine what this limiting thought or belief is. Once you have figured that out (by yourself, with the help of a friend/boss or qualified coach), consider the information below to help yourself make a lasting change. The best approach is to replace whatever you are thinking is with a thought that is more positive. For example:
By Marcel Schwantes at Inc. In 2016, the World Economic Forum released its fascinating Future of Jobs Report, where they asked chief human resources officers from global companies what they saw as the top 10 job skills required for workers to thrive by 2020. One skill projected for success in 2020 that didn’t even crack the top 10 list in 2015 was — you guessed it — emotional intelligence. According to many experts in the field, emotional intelligence has become an important predictor of job success for nearly two decades, even surpassing technical ability. In one noteworthy CareerBuilder survey of more than 2,600 U.S. hiring managers and human resources professionals, it was found that “fifty-nine percent of employers would not hire someone who has a high IQ but low [emotional intelligence].” In fact, 75 percent of survey respondents said they’re more likely to promote someone with high emotional intelligence over someone with high IQ. Companies are placing a high value on workers with emotional intelligence for several reasons. In my own studies and observations over the years as a leadership coach, here are six that really stand out... By Angela Duckworth, CEO and Co-Founder of Character Lab, UPenn Professor of Psychology at Character Lab
How are you feeling?" Uncle Marvin wanted to know. Marc Brackett, now the founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, was 12 years old. It was one of the first times in his life that someone had asked him this question sincerely and seemed open to an answer other than “Fine, thanks.” In fact, Marc was anything but fine. And because Uncle Marvin’s question gave him permission, he told the truth: “I have no real friends… I suck at sports… I’m fat, and the kids at school all hate me.” Around other adults — including his own parents — Marc felt unseen. But Uncle Marvin was different. By Leo Babauta, Creator of Zen Habits. Vegan, dad, husband.
For the last dozen years, I’ve been living a (relatively) simple life. At times, the complexity of my life grows, and I renew my commitment to living simply. Living a simple life is about paring back, so that you have space to breathe. It’s about doing more with less, because you realize that having more and doing more doesn’t lead to happiness. It’s about finding joys in the simple things, and being content with solitude, quiet, contemplation and savoring the moment. I’ve learned some key lessons for living a simple life, and I thought I’d share a few with you. ... Dr. Travis Bradberry
When emotional intelligence (EQ) first appeared to the masses, it served as the missing link in a peculiar finding: people with average IQs outperform those with the highest IQs 70 percent of the time. This anomaly threw a massive wrench into the broadly held assumption that IQ was the sole source of success. Decades of research now point to emotional intelligence as being the critical factor that sets star performers apart from the rest of the pack. The connection is so strong that 90 percent of top performers have high emotional intelligence. “No doubt emotional intelligence is more rare than book smarts, but my experience says it is actually more important in the making of a leader. You just can’t ignore it.” – Jack Welch Emotional intelligence is the “something” in each of us that is a bit intangible. It affects how we manage behavior, navigate social complexities, and make personal decisions to achieve positive results.  Photo credit: yeshi-kangrang-unsplash by Kelly Miller, Positive Psychology. com
So many humans are walking around this planet unaware of the impact they have on the people around them. Within each of us is a tremendous capacity to affect change. Yet, too many of us simply react to the creations of others. Being self-aware and practicing daily reflection and introspection allows each of us the opportunity to find what we really want out of this precious life. We are all susceptible to outside influence and personal bias. Without self-awareness, we are even more susceptible. When one can accomplish self-mastery through a deep understanding of the internal self and the public self through the attainment of true self-awareness, real freedom can be achieved. Let’s explore more: Is Self-Awareness the Same as Self-Reflection & Introspection? By Michael Schneider
The transition from individual contributor to manager is not an easy one. In many cases, the skills that got you the promotion will not be the same ones that make you effective as a manager. Luckily, we have organizations like Google that have spent years researching this transition, to help us demystify the secrets to new managers' success. Using Project Oxygen, an internal study that analyzed more than 10,000 manager impressions including performance reviews, surveys, and nominations for top-manager awards and recognition, Google identified eight habits of highly effective managers. Google also designed a management training workshop to share its newfound knowledge with its bosses and now the world. Through the company's Re:Work website, a resource that shares Google's perspective on people operations, Google posted this training presentation in hopes that it could benefit all. Let's take a look at the six key attributes that Google instills in its managers. Guest post by Nate Regier for the Seapoint Center
Ask anyone about “conflict” and you’ll most likely hear negative descriptions such as: painful, damaging, draining, upsetting, disrespectful, demeaning and relationship-destroying. Most people dread conflict and can’t imagine how they could turn conflict into an energy source because they don’t understand what it really is. Conflict is simply energy – the energy caused by a gap between what you want and what you are experiencing. The energy of conflict can be misused in “drama” or it can be harnessed to create something positive and useful. The Cost of “Drama” Drama is created by “struggling against self or others, with or without awareness, in order to feel justified about our negative behavior.” FYI: this is a very long article.
by Benjamin P. Hardy, Author, husband, father According to the British philosopher, Alain de Botton, “Anyone who isn’t embarrassed of who they were last year probably isn’t learning enough.” How different is your life, right now, from where you were 12 months ago? If it’s quite similar, then you haven’t been learning very much. To learn, by nature, is to change and evolve. In order to change and evolve, you need to regularly create peak experiences — those moments which create deep awe, gratitude, and a shift in how you see yourself and the world. When was your last peak experience? What was the last time you flexed your courage muscles? When was the last time you tried something that might not work? If you’re ready to make wild progress during 2019, you need to make some tweaks. This isn’t anything to be upset, distraught, or frustrated about. Life is, inherently, a learning experience. Life is beautiful. You get to have fun with it. One thing that is really beautiful about moving forward intensely in your future is that, simultaneously, you change your memory about the past. The past, regardless of what it has been — great or disappointing — will change in meaning as you make new decisions in your future. Your future is flexible. Your past is also flexible. What you have is now. You get to decide what you’re going to do. You get to decide how you’re going to live. Look around… No one is stopping you. Want to make a shift? Here are 30 behaviors to get you started: 1. Wake Up Earlier “You’re more likely to act yourself into feeling, than feeling yourself into action.” —  Shutterstock photo by Marcel Schwantes
Nobody likes to fail. Yet failure is the secret to success. If you haven't been rejected a number of times, the current mantra goes, you just haven't experienced success. Sir Richard Branson, founder of Virgin Group, swears by this premise. At Virgin, they encourage and even celebrate failure. There's an underlying theme there that, without trying something new and failing, it's virtually impossible to innovate and grow. Branson says, "Do not be embarrassed by your failures. Learn from them and start again. Making mistakes and experiencing setbacks is part of the DNA of every successful entrepreneur, and I am no exception." Wherever you are on your career path, it's time to acknowledge that failing is common, no matter how hard you try to avoid it. But here's the thing. There's one superhuman quality -- a mindset -- every person needs to master on their journey of failing forward. Without it, you may as well toss in the towel now and never try again. I speak of resilience. by Dr. Travis Bradberry Author of #1 bestselling book, Emotional Intelligence 2.0, and president of TalentSmart.
Toxic people defy logic. Some are blissfully unaware of the negative impact that they have on those around them, and others seem to derive satisfaction from creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons. As important as it is to learn how to deal with different kinds of people, truly toxic people will never be worth your time and energy—and they take a lot of each. Toxic people create unnecessary complexity, strife, and, worst of all, stress. “People inspire you, or they drain you—pick them wisely.” - Hans F. Hansen ... read on...  Shutterstock Suzie Doscher, AMC, Executive and Life Coach, Switzerland Many believe they would need to complete another university degree, more trainings, attend more seminars, spend 5 years is a higher position, or take a sabbatical on an remote island contemplating the state of the universe. All of the above are most valuable – not necessarily the only answer. The truth is, you can be more effective, start including your creative mind and gain the confidence to go well beyond your wildest dreams - it might only take a small adjustment to who you are now. Enhance your emotional intelligence skills - the ‘soft skills’ and unleash your full potential. Your Emotional Intelligence is just as important as your cognitive ability. I believe everyone is a "High Potential." And that includes you. Given the right support and encouragement, you can transform into a better version of yourself. I have been helping individuals accomplish this transformation for the past +12 years. My goal is to see you operating at your very highest potential. Not only intellectually but emotionally as well. During our coaching conversation you will begin to experience a sense of clarity and focus. Together we will identify the factors that are holding you back. The coaching offers a rich environment that raises your self-awareness. At all times I work to maintain an environment that is confidential, discreet, I am a neutral outsider, my feedback is open, honest, intuitive, and most importantly -- without judgment. Do not think for a minute life coaching will not work for you. It is often the one missing ingredient that turns a good performer into an impressive one. Knowing how to handle yourself in all situations is the most valuable skill you can possess in life. Contact me for your no-obligation first discussion.
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